In honor of the XX Winter Olympic Games, I present my favorite quotes from Jerry Seinfeld's stand up, "I'm Telling You For The Last Time":



"So many events of the Olympics don't make sense to me, I don't understand their connection to any reality. Like in the Winter Olympics, they have that Biathlon, you know that one? That combines cross-country skiing with shooting a gun. How many alpine snipers are into this? To me it's like combining swimming and strangle a guy. Why don't we have that? That makes absolutely as much sense to me."

"And that other one that I love is the luge. You know the luge, where the guy wears the slick suit. This is on the bobsled run, but it's not even a sled. It's just Bob! It's just a human being hanging on for their life. This is the whole sport, just AHHHHHHHHH! 'Oh, he pointed his toes. This guy is a tremendous athlete.'"

Here's to Bob, and his sled. Cheers.